Post-Vaccination Thoughts

The day I didn't think would come until the fall surprisingly happened yesterday. So I was a bit unprepared to vomit all of my feelings.

A quick note to share I got my first round of COVID-19 vaccination!

Thanks to the efforts of my wife-turned-vaccine-hunter, I was able to get into UTSW’s clinic last night.  One shot down (Pfizer), one more step towards normalcy.  

For those of you who have also received vaccinations, I wonder if you experienced reactions similar to mine.  Not physical — my left arm was pretty much useless today due to post-shot soreness — but emotional.  

My appointment could not have lasted longer than 20 minutes end-to-end, and the entire time I was on the verge of tears.  The second I got into line, a year’s worth of stress, depression, and anxiety all decided to have their coming-out party in public without my consent.

In addition, I was overwhelmed by a growing sense of alienation.  Last night was the first time I’d been around so many people at once, the first time I’d been to downtown Dallas in nearly as long, the first time I’ve felt that I was closer to the marathon finish than start.

I got my shot, waited the recommended 15-minutes afterward, headed back to my car… and immediately ugly-cried.  It’s was such a relief, both to have received protection but to also just release the pressure value.  I came home feeling rather dark and twisty thanks to an emotional hangover.  Twenty-four hours later, I’m much improved mentally and feeling more hopeful than I have in some time.

I hope y’all have gotten your shots, or are close to getting them.  Keep staying safe — we have a lot of catching up to do soon enough. Thanks to UTSW for such stellar organization and compassion.

p.s. I celebrated with some cake. Would you like a slice?